It's April Fools!
big whoop- The Four Stages of April Fools Apathy
In younger years when I generally had more of a sunny disposition, I was always game for a good practical joke. Heh, that Fun Dan is up to his pranks again! Those were the days. Usually these things were spontaneous and dependent on a situation that arose calling for shenanigans, but I wasn’t good at preparing beforehand for something like April Fools, though I’ve used this occasion a few times to try to trick friends into believing something outrageous and funny. Now my feeling is more: (activate British accent) I can’t be bothered.
Today I was at the worksite with Kenny, my son. Right after eating lunch I checked my (infernal) smart phone for messages and noticed that it was April 1st. As I walked back down the hill to the work area, I thought about playing an April 1st trick on Kenny or some other friend, family member or substack follower. That idea lasted 2 seconds max and I figured why bother. Then I thought about mentioning the date to Kenny in a fun way. That idea lasted 1 second max and I decided to just blurt out, “Hey Kenny, it’s April 1st.”
-Yeah, so?
“It’s April Fools Day,” said I, deadpan but without deadpan-type humorous delivery.
“Oh, right,” said Kenny.
I would say “without missing a beat”, but he did take at least a full two seconds to come up with this schema of April Fools enthusiasm.
“The four stages of April Fools eagerness,” said Kenny.
Dan- What?
Kenny- The four stages of April Fools eagerness.
D- What do you mean?
K- I mean there are four stages, and you seem to be in stage four. You don’t seem excited at all to tell me that today is April Fools, and you didn’t even try to play a trick on me.
D- Nah. I don’t have the energy.
K- Exactly. Here are the stages (Kenny’s definitions but I gave each stage a name):
Enthusiastic Stage: Ha! It’s April Fools, I’ll really play a fast one on my friends with this trick. Oh boy. Everyone’s gonna love it!
Aloof/Cool Stage: This is dumb and I’m too cool for this. I’ll mention April Fools but I’ll make sure everyone knows I think the whole thing is childish and a waste of time.
Ironic half-fun Stage: OK, I’ll mention April Fools but only in an ironic way. Like I’ll pretend that I’m part of the whole joke but really I’m mocking it by playing along. With a little hype we’ll still make it fun!
Forget this stage- It’s all too much work and I don’t have the energy.
Kenny said, “See, you’re in stage 4.”
I laughed and said, “Did you make that all up right there on the spot?”
-Yeah.
But then I thought, it’s pretty accurate. And then I gave up thinking about an April Fools joke for my friends, family and substack readers.
Fred VanCamp had left us at the work site and took the pickup to some spots in the valley where he had to talk to customers. I was happy to just get dirty, work with my hands and be spared the ol’ schmoozola. When he returned he spent a couple hours getting dirty too and helping with the landscaping. After we loaded up the truck and I started the engine, the radio kicked on. Fred, sitting shotgun, was in the middle of a monologue when the NPR announcer said, in a playful way, “It’s April Fooools Day!”
Fred turned the radio off and continued with his story but I heard Kenny whisper behind me: “Stage three.”
loved playing my bit part, even if i didnt know it!
The only attention I pay to April Fool's is to notice how you may have once suspected recent news releases as being an April Fool's trick, but every other date is now the same.